A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn’t find one big enough for her family.
She asked the stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?” The stock boy answered, [Continued...]
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“Thanksgiving is America’s national chow-down feast, the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty.” – Michael Dresser On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my potential-acquaintance-abuse-survivor gave to me, TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming, ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in [Continued...] “Good Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Easter. Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Christmas.” “It was different when we were kids. In second grade, a teacher came in and gave us all a lecture about not smoking, and then they sent us over to arts and crafts to [Continued...] Listen very closely when kids sing Christmas carols, This is what you just might hear! Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly… Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. |
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