“April showers are taxpayers’ tears.” – Arnold Glasow
Welcome! Have a click around - you're sure to find something that motivates or inspires you to live with more intensity and purpose. “Help me to accomplish the purpose of my journey.” - Genesis 24:12, A Servant’s Prayer A taxpayer received a strongly worded “second notice” that his taxes were overdue. Hastening to the collector’s office, he paid his bill, saying apologetically that he had overlooked the first notice. “Oh,” confided the collector with a smile, “we don’t send out first notices. We have found that the second notices are more effective.” “If we ever forget that we’re one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under.” – Ronald Reagan
NEW AND IMPROVED IRS FORM 1040-2EZ
Tax Form: Year ___________________
Name: ____________________________
Address: _________________________
City: ____________________________
State: ___________________________
Zip: _____________________________
Social Security Number:
________-______-__________
1. How much money did you make
during the previous year?
$_______________________
2. Send it to us:
Internal Revenue Service
Payment Processing Center
Memphis, TN, USA
The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet: The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried over time (professional wrestlers, longshoremen, etc.), but nobody could do it. One day this scrawny little man came in, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a tiny, squeaky voice, “I’d like to try the bet.” After the laughter had died down, the bartender agreed, grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed the dried, wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man. But the crowd’s laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and SIX drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the $1000, and asked the little man, “What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight lifter, or what?” The man replied, “I work for the IRS.” “The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help.’” – Ronald Reagan |
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